I
carried kavady until the age of 48, and when I was 50 I gave my kavady
to Seelan. I didn’t just carry one kavady, I carried up to 10 a year –
for my mother – all the way from Port Shepstone to Richard’s Bay. I used
to pierce myself without being in a trance, but my faith in Muruga and
my love for my mother allowed me to do that. My father died of a heart
attack on a Tuesday morning, on the Wednesday we had the funeral, and
that Sunday I carried kavady. Nobody spoke to me for months. My mother
was still living at that time and I needed to fulfill my promise to her.
Nobody came with me because it was against any principle they knew.
They said I can’t do it and they disowned me for months. Nothing has
happened to me since. If somebody died, I carried kavady.
When
my mother died my brothers and I had a fall-out because they wanted to
do 16 days but my teaching is against that. I don’t believe in it
because I follow the Bhagavad Gita and there is no 16 days. So I didn’t
do the 16 days. Right there, where our samadhi shrine is now, my
mother’s body lay and I did the hawan there. I took the hawan to the
crematorium, put it on my mother, pushed her into the burner and that’s
all.
You know what happened?
When we went to the beach with the ashes I could feel my mother around
my leg. The ash came around my leg and wouldn’t leave. My brothers did
the 16 days. But I’m fine. I’m happy. I know where my mother is. They
don’t. So, therefore, do not follow what you are told by your parents
100%. They are also following in fear what they learned from their
parents. I explained to you about the 16 days and 10 days. In the olden
days the crematorium, or ghat, was not near the house so they had to
carry the body all the way there. They could not eat boiled foods while
travelling so they still tell us today that we should not eat boiled
foods. Give your mother everything while she is living, not when she’s
dead.
Vish
and I went somewhere today and saw a beautiful hearse. I said, “What’s
the point of putting a dead person into a beautiful hearse? He doesn’t
know about it”. Give your parents everything you can now. My
father-in-law used to like Mainstay cane. I would buy him a bottle and
hide it away and tell him where it was so he wouldn’t get caught. When
he died there was a whole bottle of Mainstay there at the funeral so I
asked why. They said it was because he liked it so I said, “He can’t
drink it now. You’re going to drink it”. And they said, “Ja, we’re
waiting”.
If you have parents
make sure you give them everything that you can give them. I only have 2
regrets, that I didn’t take my father to India and that I didn’t take
my mother to India. Otherwise I gave them everything. That’s why today
I’m happy, I don’t have any doubt or guilt. Your parents are 2 people
you don’t ignore, no matter what the circumstance, because it’ll come
back to bite you. Remember that. Your parents are the most important
people in your life, then your husband or wife. If you’ve got that right
then you have life right. So allow me to be the lamp at your feet and
the light on your path.
